My name is Nur Laila. I am a Muslimah who has followed and obeyed everything that my parents have taught me, especially in matters of faith and Islam. But even so, as I grew older, my heart and soul were still empty even though I had sought answers to the questions of life from Islam and its teachings.
One day, I came across an answer and a solution to all the spiritual turmoil and anxiety in my soul and heart. Since that time, I have been able to know Him more deeply, day by day.
I was born into a Muslim family. My parents are very pious and religious Muslims. My grandfather taught me to recite the Quran from the time I was four years old until I was seven years old. As a pious Muslimah, I perform my prayers five times a day and study Islamic studies from 6 pm to 8.30 pm every Saturday to Thursday.
After completing my studies in secondary school, I continued my education at the institute of higher learning (IPT) where I have studied regular education as well as Islamic education. I have learned so much about Islam, as well as deepened its knowledge quite well, even so, Islam is not able to calm my soul or produce a meaningful life or even be a guide for life for me seriously. The situation in my heart and soul is still empty and restless and I have never enjoyed what is understood as the love of God of Islam!
After deepening my knowledge and study of Islam, I found that it was as if the love of Allah was not the true love of God or the true love. Moreover, the love of Allah for the religion of Islam is very limited and very conditional; I had to do all sorts of things and rules so that I could qualify to experience His love, namely ' irrahman and arrahim -Nya '! I do not raise questions like this to my parents because they consider such questions to be a 'great sin'!
One day, after I performed my prayers to Allah, I cried and a feeling of sadness enveloped me because I could not know or feel what is the love and affection of Allah swt! Soon after, I turned on my radio and by chance, just in time it was a Christian radio station broadcast. A Christian woman is reading from the Bible, Matthew verse 11 verse 28, which reads:
'Sayidina Isa said: "Come to Me, all of you who are tired and bear a heavy burden, I will give you relief. "'
I have thought to myself: "Who is this Sayidina Isa, who is able and willing to bestow relief on mankind burdened? I remember saying to Him," If You are indeed Divine, and Sayidina Isa who has actually stated so, please, let me know You! "
During my First Year at the University, I was invited to a party by my friends. Most of them there are Christians. I have heard the story of Sayidina Isa Al-Masih again. A pretty unique expression caught my attention: "Jesus loves you." I am reminded of the past, where my search for the truth of Allah swt's love was empty. So at that moment, I wanted to know who Jesus really was because if He truly loved me, I would be His faithful follower! That is why I have said to Jesus: " Sayidina Isa Al-Masih, if You are indeed divine, and love me, let me know You! "
Two nights later, while asleep I had a dream. My dream was to see a very beautiful light on the doorstep of my house! I wanted to touch the light, but my feet were stuck to the floor! At the same time, my mother's voice was heard: "Do not approach that light." I was suddenly awakened in a sweaty state. I misunderstood what the beautiful light meant and told it to my Christian friend about my dream and he explained that I had to study the Bible to find the answer. And the answer is found in the Gospel text, Yahya (John) chapter 9 verse 5:
"As long as I am in this world, I AM THE LIGHT OF THE WORLD."
That is the sound of Sayidina Isa's words and indeed He is the light of the world. I realized at that moment that He also wanted me to realize and acknowledge that He is the only Light of the World and I must follow His path! Since my dream, I have read and studied the book of the New Testament in the Bible daily. The more I deepen my knowledge in Sayidina Isa Al-Masih and realize who He really is, the more it becomes clear that the concept of Isa Al-Masih in Islam and the Qur'an is very superficial!
I have surrendered all my soul and life into the hands of Jesus Christ! I have also been worried about my relationship with my family because they are Muslims; and I, as a follower of Sayidina Rabbani Isa Al-Masih will probably persecute me. However, God has blessed His wisdom to me to withstand all kinds of obstacles and challenges. If my faith is not strong, my family will not be able to know the true God and God.
Then, God gave me dreams that have come true! Although my native language Malay language, I am also fluent in Thai. One of those dreams involved a family of my friends whose parents learned Thai from me. In my dream, they were on a hill and the situation there was very dry. They looked very tired and suddenly their youngest son had slipped into the valley at the bottom of the hill. They were very anxious about their son and cried and sobbed because of his condition. At that moment, I also suddenly woke up and realized that God wanted me to pray for the safety of my family in my dream. Two days later, thanks Alhamdulillah! After I prayed for them and for their recovery as a family, in the name of Sayidina Isa Al-Masih, they were all healed and their health had returned to normal 100 percent! Dreams from Allah like this have helped me strengthen my faith in Allah and in His true Way - namely Sayidina Rabbani Isa himself, who has stated:
"I am the WAY, the TRUTH and the LIFE. No one comes to God except through Me."
John 14 verse 6.
Two years later after the dream, I embraced the teachings of the gospel and accepted Jesus Christ as the atonement for my sins and also as my own Rabbi and Lord! I have also explained to my mother the reasons why I made that decision. As usual, she thought I was doing something 'unwise', however, I told her I had come to know the true and right God. My parents were not happy with my decision to become a follower of Sayidina Isa Al-Masih. This is a common reaction for many Muslims especially when they try to deal with Muslims who have rejected the teachings of Islam and want to be true followers of Sayidina Isa even for quite reasonable reasons! However, as an adult, they realize that my decision should be respected by all parties. I have already handed over my beloved family into the hands of Allah swt, and I am sure they will also realize who the true God is and embrace it unanimously.
[Source: http://pedson.blogspot.com/2008/01/muslimah-masuk-kristen-kesaksian-nur.html]
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